just another manic tuesday
4.27.2004
Like most days, I wake up a little after 7:30, get to work a little after nine, get home at 6:15. Today I actually made dinner instead of heating up leftovers, so after all the chopping and boiling and sautéing I sat down to eat at 8:30. Then I clean up all the pots and pans and accumulated dishes from days past and next thing I know the 10:00 news is on. Thank goodness I don't do this everyday. Maybe my time management skills are off.
I haven't felt like posting lately. Between eight hours of Celine Dion at work and KOTOR and Law and Order at home my day is packed. Maybe I'm just listless. The recruitment fair was a little of a letdown. There's a slight possibility of a teaching position opening in the fall. If I really want to teach — and yes, I really do want to teach in the future, — I'm going to have to get serious about looking at graduate programs. It's kind of perverse; though I'm excited about teaching, I'm really not excited about being a student again. And thinking about taking tests and making slides and filling out applications completely puts me off.
I was an undergrad for way too long. And I've only been out of school for about two years. I'm just now getting used to making a decent living, not having to watch every penny to pay tuition and buy supplies. I like working a steady job and having my evenings free. I like the life I'm living now. I don't think I'm ready to give that up to go back to pasting up comps at midnight, worrying about making this month's rent, and trying not to get run over by bicyclists on campus.
I know I can't stay where I'm at forever. But I'm not even close to the burnout point yet - I still go to work excited about what I might be working on, and what I could learn from doing the work. The biggest thing this job has taught me is that the Web is exactly where I want to be. It gets me so jazzed that new developments are cropping up all the time - there's always something more for me to learn. That's what I love.
Wasn't I just complaining about being listless? Didn't I just say I don't want to be a student? The thing is, I am a student right now. I'm a student studying just what I want to study, without the B.S. of a class schedule and grades and tuition. Too bad I can't get a degree for self-education.
